BLOODLETTER'S SINNINGS:
The Truth Behind Religion and Knowledge
I am the bloodletter, I am true to myself and true to my life. Here within lies many important truths about life, along with one of my own journals, and whatever else I find necessary.
(click on a chapter to instantly go to it)
I. THE FIRST BLOOD
II. GOD HAD AN ABORTION
III. DEVIL OF AN ANIMAL
IV. THE SINS OF INSTINCT
V. DECEIVING EVOLUTION
VI. ROMANCE, LOVE, AND LUST
VII. THE VEMPYRE HERESY
VIII. ENSCRIBED IN BLOOD
IX. PROOF THE BIBLE IS FALSE
X. SUFFERING MOONS
XI. ETERNAL INTELLECT
XII. KNOWLEDGE IS POWER
I - THE FIRST BLOOD
Life was born from the depths of cruelty. Life is not meant to be fair, it is not meant to be enjoyed, and it is not meant to be hated. Life is what you make of it. Life all depends on how you look at it. Once you recognize life for what it is, you can do anything you want with it. Most people deceive themselves, and never find the true meaning of life. Others are so deep in their own lies, that they forget they are lies. Many others are pressured by the majority to believe a single notion, and never question it or give it a second thought. I know many things that most people will never know, but I will share many secrets with you. This is the first drop of blood to open your eyes to the truth. Every animal has a body full of blood, perhaps before you die all your blood will have lived within the world that is true and hidden within falsities. (return to top)
II - GOD HAD AN ABORTION
This is one of my favorite subjects, the truths and myths of Christianity and other God-worshipping religions of the sort. Religion is often a way to explain life, and Christianity is one of the most popular ways to explain it, does that mean its right? Think about this, back when you were school, what grade did most of the students get on their test? Were most of them right? Or did only a few students score greatly, then many others did quite poorly on the test. Religion is a test, and most of us are failing it. It doesn't exist. If God exists and this is a true or false question, then simply enough, the answer is false, because there is no God.. God is usually pictured as a man. Man can more easily build muscle then women, but women are better at everything else just about. I am a man. I am not mocking all men; I am simply stating the facts. Some men can realize their flaws, and gain intellect, but most, don't. Most men are incompetent, and think with their dicks before their heads. Yes, men do think about sex quite a bit, but I'm one of the few people that still believe in true romance and love. If God is a man, then that is why this world is so unbalanced and corrupt, God is also incompetent, he is a fool, and he is our creator. The world is dieing, it is all just one huge sick joke, because God is male. I don't believe in any God or Goddess, I'm just getting started on the flaws of believing that there is. The Bible, one of my favorite books, when I need a good laugh. The bible tells stories of many biblical figures that lived hundreds of years. I wonder if these extremely old men were old cripples for an extremely long time, or were they teenagers for a lot longer then their parents wanted. I wonder what kind of diet they were on to live nearly five hundred years? I wonder if that extra 450 years just sucked. I wonder why no one recently has lived this long, I guess they don't make them like they used to. Even though now we eat healthier and can cure many illnesses and are aware of much more, but I guess it wasn't like the good ole days. Are you beginning to see my point, I've used a lot of sarcasm to make it stand out. The bible says that Adam was made of sand, a human body, flesh and blood, made out of sand. Now we needed a woman, so one of Adam's ribs turned into a woman, Eve. A human body, flesh and blood, made out of one bone. What makes this less ridiculous then the Roman and Greek beliefs? Aphrodite was formed from Zeus's forehead; Eve was formed from Adam's rib. What's the difference? It is known that the bible was made by many "wisemen" that were told by God what to write. I often like to ask, how do you know one of the "wisemen" didn't simply write down a bunch of lies to show the stupidity of the people. A preacher of the church tells me, "because its God's will, he would not let lies be written in the bible, they are his words." I wonder why then, if the bible could not be falsely written, I can go out, and rip apart bibles, burn the pages, mock every word in the bible, or even worse yet, beat someone to death, with the book of God. God will not stop any of this, so why not let a few words slip in its creating? The bible requires a preacher to explain each individual of the religion what the bible means. If God wrote the bible, why would he write it so no one could understand it without being told how to understand it? Many other religions allow their followers to conceive their beliefs in their own way. How one person speaks to their God and interprets their God could be totally different from the next. In Anton Szandor Levay's, The Satanic Bible, it tells you that each person interprets The Satanic Bible differently; you should not be told how to understand it. You read it with an open mind and understand it in the way that suites and seems truthful to you. I'm not saying to become a Satanist, I'm just making an example. Through generations even Christian Preachers could slowly change their own interpretations of the bible, who knows the way they preach it now could be totally different from 200 years ago. My point is, why would God write the bible in words that no one can understand, and over time, the correct meanings will be altered and lost? God has never sinned, so it is said, but he allowed Satan to create hell, and torture all the damned souls of humanity. God allows people to suffer on earth, he watches them die. It is God's will that Satan continues to live, and make men fear him, and to allow people to die, lie, and kill. Is this not the greatest Sin of all? This Sinister God allows all sins to be committed, when he can stop them, but he will not, because it is his will, it is his sinister will. If Satan cannot tell a lie, then perhaps God is actually Satan because so far everything God has said is a lie. Christians believe those who are not Christians will go to Hell. Everyone before Christianity was invented went to Hell, and seeing that only 12% of the world now is Christian, theres a lot of people going to Hell. Even those starving people who don't even know about religion who are just trying to find some food before they die, will go to Hell. Christianity is truly cruel if all go to Hell simply due to lack of knowledge or if they're just perfect people and don't follow Christianity. It is God's will for most of humanity to go to Hell, I guess Heaven doesn't have room for us all. Sad isn't it? (return to top)
III - DEVIL OF AN ANIMAL
The devil. Lucifer, Hades, Leviathan, every religion has some version of him. Every single depiction of the devil I've seen was represented by an animal. Why an animal? Animals only follow their instincts and are true to themselves. It is people that lie to themselves and others, who are selfish and always crave something better for themselves. People always want something they don't have, whether it is a physical possession, a pet, or even just someone to hold them. Yes, people can think about others, and want things for other people, but everyone has something they want. Animals do not crave for what they do not have, unless they need it to survive. Animals aren't people, but people are animals. People deny being animals, but we too, are just another animal, just our methods of colonization are much different then the animals. Therefore we see the animals as evil, and we use them to symbolize or devils. We will not allow ourselves to be thought of as an animal, therefore they are evil. Why do we have cities, civilizations, and farming? Long ago a man received a mutated gene, or even a virus if you would like to call it that. It caused him to always want more then what he had. From this we went from a cave, to a hut, to a house, to enormous buildings. From this we didn't like to hunt anymore, we decided to farm and raise cattle. From this one single gene we decided walking wasn't fast enough, and invented the wagon, then the car, and then the airplane. I will not deny that I crave for more then what I have. I always would like to have more money. I would love to have more influence on more of you. Atleast I know if you're reading this you might have some chance of realizing what the world is truly about. We are different because we always crave more, so we are afraid to admit we too, are animals. Because we are different, that makes us the superior race, but we are not superior, only different. I assure you we too are animals, and if you depict your false devils as animals, then you are the lowest abomination to have crawled upon this earth. We are all animals and we should live respectfully with all animals for what they are, being racist to animals, I believe, is just as bad as being racist to people. Don't disrespect animals because they're not human. If you must then disrespect humans because they are animals, but animals who lie to themselves and each other, and ignore their instincts because that's what their parents taught them. We're all one devil of an animal. (return to top)
IV - THE SINS OF INSTINCT
This section will focus on what are believed to be sins by some religions.
Let's do the sins of Christianity.
Pride- Pride is feeling proud of who you are and how your image comes across
to other people. If you wear designer clothes and comb your hair a certain
way everyday then even this is an example of taking pride in yourself.
Greed- Greed is simply meaning you want more then your fair
share. Some examples of greed are wanting more money, desiring more clothes
or compact discs then someone else, or even to want something better then
someone else like getting an "A" on a test.
Envy- Envy is wanting something that someone else already has,
or wanting something that you do not have. If you wish you were more attractive,
had more money, or lived a happy life like someone else who you believe is
living a fabulous life, then you are practicing Envy.
Wrath- Anger is one of our first reactions to something that
does not go as we had hoped it would, or when someone annoys or disrespects
us. Wrath is feeling angry with someone or something.
Lust- This is a popular one nowadays. Lust is the self-destructive
drive for pleasure out of proportion to its worth. Lust is wanting to participate
in sexual tendencies with the purposes of giving into sexual urges rather
then for reason of love.
Gluttony- Gluttony is mostly thought of when it comes to food,
but it also applies to entertainment goods and things of that sort, you don't
need them. Standard gluttony means eating more then you need to survive. If
you eat three meals a day I know for a fact you are practicing gluttony. If
you are overweight you are practicing gluttony. As a matter of fact, if you're
not on the brink of starvation you are practicing gluttony.
Sloth- Sloth is laziness, sometimes this means slowly drifting
away from God, then other times it just means doing nothing and being a couch
potatoe. If you sit in front of your television for extensive periods of time
throughout the day then you are practicing sloth.
As you can see, the seven deadly sins are things we practice everyday, including
Christians. Let's look at an interesting concept. Let's say you practice in
gluttony, you eat more then your share and become overweight. Your pride for
yourself causes you to lose all your access weight making you look respectable
again. You just used a sin to undo a sin. It certainly doesn't state this
anywhere in the bible, yet it is common sense. (return to top)
V - DECEIVING EVOLUTION
Evolution. One word that describes the way the world is and how it came about. Everyone has their own way of interpreting the world and how it came about. Evolution is one of the more reasonable ones, that actually makes sense. Let's go over the principles of Evolution. Atoms gathered, forming an enormous clutter of atoms, turning into the earth. The middle of the earth pulsed with heat from the compression of the atoms, melting the surface of the earth into a solid. Air and water developed, then eventually single-celled organisms. The single-celled organisms became multicellular, which then became fish, which then sprouted legs and became reptiles, which then grew hair, creating mammals, which became apes, which then became us. It makes sense, over time what was simple got more complex. The same with diseases, we had very few long ago, we didn't have to cook our meat as thoroughly as we do now. One disease turned into millions of them, every one completely different, making it difficult to cure them. I personally believe in Evolution, but many don't. Christians to be specific. Christians believe all of humanity spawned from Adam and Eve. Adam was formed from dust because God wanted it to be so, then Eve was formed from Adam's rib. Why is it that it is completely ridiculous to believe that Aphrodite birthed from the forehead of Zeus, yet it is perfectly normal and actually popular and strongly believed by some that Eve came from the rib of a man made from dust! From what I've studied into anatomy through many science classes is that a rib cannot turn into a person and a person cannot be composed of inanimate sand. Certainly a man made from soil and a woman made of a single bone could not produce all of humanity! I realize I often question Christianity, but I want to point out some good points about it. Christianity is certainly false and you can live a much happier life if you're not trying to prevent sinning when the word "sin" truly has no meaning. The bible is a falsity. (return to top)
VI - ROMANCE, LOVE, AND LUST
Over time, everything changes. The people change, the cultures change, and expectations and beliefs change. This world was once a very romantic place full of love, but nowadays, the true meaning for the word love is being lost, and being replaced with lust. Sex is not love. Love is feeling so strongly for someone, that you would do anything for them if it were to benefit them. Love is the purest, strongest emotion we can feel. True romanticists know the word well, but unfortunately, very few of them still exist. It is no longer looked upon in shame when women show their legs, hips, and basically as much as possible. Love was known better when temptation was not constantly present. Sexual appeal makes us lust, whether male or female. We want to feel attractive, so we wear as little as possible, then others find us attractive, but only physically, they don't see the real you at all. In this process the meaning of the word, love, is lost. When temptation is present men and women will give into their sexual tendencies. Sex is not always beneficial if two people aren't in love. It can cause shame upon yourself, your pride, your respect, and just unhappiness for having sex with someone who you did not love. Especially the first time, it is usually the worst. As a virgin you may think you want sex, but once you receive it, before you are truly ready and in love, you can regret it. Unfortunately it is no longer called rape if you don't regret doing it until after you have already accepted the invitation to ruin your pride. The pride, by the way, that is a sin if you're Christian. Now the world rests upon a throne of sex. Sexually transmitted diseases are becoming more frequently spread and more types of them are appearing all the time. This is not because two people fell in love, its because someone lost control of their urges with numerous partners. These times make me sick. Don't give into lust, it will do you no good. At most you will momentarily feel pleasured and relieved, but in the long run it can affect you negatively for the rest of your life. If you don't ruin your own life you might ruin the life of whoever you're with. The guilt of ruining someone else's life is certainly no easy weight to bear either, so its best not to give into someone just because they are coming onto you. Once you get to know them and love them, if you make that choice hopefully it will be the right one. Until then, do not risk your life or the life of someone who doesn't realize the consequences I am teaching you of. Learn from my words and do not make a devastating mistake as so many have before you. (return to top)
VII - THE VEMPYRE HERESY
It is time for a new beginning, a revolution. I proclaim this day the start of the Vempyre Heresy. Learn from the past, do not forget it, lets all become the new Dark Gods that rule over this world birthed in cruelty. Gothic culture is growing, there is more of us all the time. Goth is actually much more than the sum of its parts, and, depending on who you ask, you can get a bewildering array of contradictory answers, many of which are valid parts of a much larger subculture. It is more than a label or description. Goth is at once a lifestyle and a philosophy that has its roots firmly embedded both in the historical past and the present. The central Ideal that characterizes Goth is an almost compulsive drive towards creativity and self-expression that seeks to reach out and ensnare its audience using our current society's covert but deeply rooted fascination with all things dark and frightening. This act can be either subtle and seducing or nightmarishly terrifying, but it must play on what society secretly knows but can not acknowledge to itself about its duality. The mediums of self-expression and creation can be anything from a mode of dress to novels or music. Imagination and originality have always been key elements in Goth. As a lifestyle, Goth is as diversified as its adherents. There really is no true unifying stereotype or dress code as it were. Not all Goths are depressed, nor do they all wear black, listen to the same music, or employ the same modes of self-expression. This tends to make Goth-spotting a little tricky and creates part of the tangled confusion over what it is to begin with, but this diversity also is one of the defining factors. So how does one identify a real Goth if they are all so different? Now we reach part of the heart of the counterculture! You see, as mentioned earlier, one of Goth's defining characteristics is the need to take the underlying darkness that is in all of us and bring it into the light in such a way as we can recognize it as what it is-an integral part of all of us, for better or for worse. To better understand what Goth really is, it is essential to know where it came from. It has been with us for much longer than the label we have given it. This is a subculture that has appeared, flourished, then died, only to rise again in many eras and in many societies. Its adherents have always been the young intellegensia, frustrated and bored by the parent culture. The parent cultures were usually restrictive, highly stratified into rigid caste structures, and intolerant of diversity in schools of art and thought. Because of this, nearly every manifestation of this particular type of counter-culture was greeted with suspicion, hostility, and sometimes active aggression on the part of its parent culture. Only rarely was this brand of subculture welcomed and allowed to flourish, as it was during the Italian Renaissance. Goth, as we currently know it, has its roots in Western Europe and North America during the late seventies and early eighties. The counterculture was, and still is, dominated by dissatisfied youth hailing from the middle classes, which were at that time just entering a new period of prosperous stability. The children of these newly wealthy were left, unlike their parents, with a strong feeling of instability and lack of identity. They were unable to reconcile the new values their society was trying to impress upon them with their newly fragile sense of self. The tightening lines of social restructure were separating them from their accustomed peers in both the upper and lower classes. Responding to the confusion and theft of identity, a few of the brightest and most creative children of these newly prosperous families began to create their own social structure. It was a counter culture based on a synthesis of historical elements, leaning heavily on dramatic traditions, philosophies, and schools of thought such as were popular in Byronic England, World War Two Germany, and American Beat. After spending some time with no real name for themselves many dubbed themselves New Romantics while others just called themselves Deathers then swiftly settled on Gothic as the counter culture grew and became more stable. Always more than a little bipolar in nature, Goth split into two distinct factions, one Appolonian and the other Dionysan in its approach, by 1981 when it had reached its peak. Each faction was a personification of the mixed fear and fascination the Goths felt for the darker side of their parents' legacy of materialism, elitism, and false sense of moral superiority. The difference lay in their ways of expressing their sense of alienation and abandonment. The more Appolonian faction were mainly concerned with the artistic and philosophical facets of Goth. They were, for the most part, fairly non confrontational in their means of self-expression. They were in most cases all but obsessed with the act of creation and the appreciation of literature, art and music. A number of them attempted to legitimize their subculture in the eyes of the parent culture with very little success. Because they were regarded as harmless, if morbid dreamers, they were tolerated. The more Dionysan faction of Goth passionately embraced the more hedonistic and sometimes self-destructive facets of the movement. Their contributions to Goth were more ephemeral and less easy to define in traditional terms as creativity, but still were vibrant with the haunted, dark spirit of the counter culture. Some of the more prominent Goth musicians and thinkers belonged to this faction. Being more confrontational in their self-expression, they were regarded by the parent culture as dangerous and undesirable. The modern stereotype of Goth is a twisted caricature of the more Dionysan faction that captures its decadence and tendency towards self-destruction while entirely missing its subtle artistry and depth, not to mention the entire point of Goth as a whole. By 1987, both factions of Goth had almost completely vanished, absorbed back into the parent culture as their members were forced to accept conformity to ensure individual survival as adults. A marginal percentage of the original Goth community were able to adapt to adult life remaining essentially and visibly true to themselves, while still managing to keep the income necessary to maintain the rising price of living in the style to which they had become accustomed. By this time, the new generation of disaffected youth had already begun to imitate what they perceived of the Dionysan Goths. They had embraced the dark and dangerous style of dress and felt that the lonely, arrogant music was written just for them. The stereotypical lifestyle was adventurous and daring enough to spark their already bored and world-weary imaginations. The "kindergothen" were met by rejection and almost knee-jerk disapproval by their parent culture and the remainders of the Goth community alike with almost no exceptions. Those few original Goths who tried to embrace the new groups were usually met with cold hostility and anger by those who had already either been rejected by others or had heard of the rejection. The schism between the Olde School and the new was widened even more by the labels of "Poseur" and "Faux Goth" that were bandied between the sides. By the nineties, the artistry and philosophy that drove the Goth culture had been by and large replaced with attitude, posturing and dress code. The few remaining Olde School Goths and their protégés had gone underground and were not a part of the new rise of Goth, refusing to have much to do with what they considered shallow, inarticulate upstarts that paid to much attention to what the media thought was Goth. They saw the new Goth as little more than a group of image driven drug addicts that had nothing better to offer than a dress code and a bad attitude. The New School's opinions of the originals wasn't much better. In the last few years, both Olde School and New have embraced the Internet. It has become both a medium for self-expression and a battleground between them. Oddly enough, the advent of easy access to the W3 has revealed in the New School an increased drive towards the creativity and self-expression that the Olde School Goths hold in such high esteem. The New School Goths, or Goffs as many of them have begun to call themselves, have become more like the originals than either side of the schism seems to wish to admit. Hopefully this trend will continue to thrive on the Web, bringing fresh blood and a new outlook to Goth's grasp on the dark undercurrents of our society's imagination. After all, the sweetest of flowers always did have a tendency to rise from the darkest and least savory of soils. The life of a goth promises pleasure and enchantment, depending on which path you take the two balance out differently. Many would disagree with me, but I've divided gothic subculture into individual names for each type of person, as follows:
The following are the social classes that apply to women:
CEMETERY SLUT- Uses her appearance to find lone walkers to experience
for only an evening.
SUCCUBI- Uses her appearance and seductability to completely
enslave men.
VEMPRESS-A romantacist who seeks love and an eternal soul mate,
but does not ignore her carnal desires, just keeps them more to herself or
within the shadows.
WITCH-She can be a vempress or a succubi, a vempress's spells
would affect all the mind and body, and the succubi's focus only on sexuality
and intimate desire.'
COUNTESS- any female who is held of high stature and
well known by those around her, who also is of very high intellect
and class. A succubi and cemetery slut cannot be a Countess.
The following are the social classes that apply to men:
VEMPYRE-A romantacist who seeks love and an eternal soul mate,
but does not ignore his carnal desires, just keeps them more to himself or
within the shadows.
INCCUBI- Uses his appearance and seductability to completely
enslave women.
WARLOCK-A male witch, he can be a vempyre or and incubi, a vempyre's
spells would affect all the mind and body, but the incubi's focus only on
sexuality and intimate desire.
COUNT- any male who is held of high stature and well known by
those around him, who also is of very high intellect and class. An inccubi
cannot be a count.
The following are the social classes that apply to men and women:
FOLLOWER: These are people who dress like Goths but do not have
the mind set or act like them. Sadly enough these are part of gothic culture,
because they blend right in with us, but gothic wannabes and impersonaters
annoy me greatly. They can be male or female and I wouldn't consider them
Goths, just part of our culture. They live the life of a goth but they are
not Goths, Goths tend to despise them and reveal their true identities to
the public for its what they deserve.
PSYCHIC VEMPYRE- a psychic vempyre can be male or female. They
imply for you to do things for them but never actually tell you to.
NECRO- Necros can be male or female, necros are people who are
obsessed with the depiction of dead people. They wear corpse-like paint and
tend to be fond of ideas like being a necrophiliac, although they don't take
that literally usually, just find themselves attracted to the opposite gender
who tend to look dead or are fairly inactive.
ANTISOCIALIST- an antisocialist can be male or female. An antisocialist
is basically the opposite of an antichrist, they keep to themselves, have
very few friends, and generally aren't even known that they exist. They are
often depressed and feel alone, and they usually are.
ANTICHRIST- an antichrist can be either male or female. Antichrists
make their presence well known. They despise God and are not afraid to show
it. Antichrist Counts are often those who start large rebellions, fashions,
and ideas within all culture, not just within the Goths.
I consider myself a Vempyre Count and Warlock, and I am following the steps to being a true antichrist, but my presence is not known well enough to be an antichrist. Marilyn Manson is probably the best example of an antichrist, his name is known all over the world, he is a Satanist and through his words he preaches Satanism. Many of his lyrics are quotes from the writings of Anton Szandor Levay. When Marilyn Manson was young he actually knew Anton Szandor Levay and learned much from him. Marilyn Manson refers to himself as the antichrist and lives up to his name. This does not mean hes pure evil, that means he knows how to have a good time, live life to its fullest, and speak the truth about the world through his music. He's a priest in the Church of Satan, also. Theres many religions Goths also seem to follow, I will list a few below.
Satanism- The Church of Satan and the Satanic Bible teaches truths of life and the words of Anton Szandor Levay. Am I saying that everything Anton Szander Levay ever said was 100% true? No, but I'm saying he was a genius who can set us on the right path. From his inspirational words we can find truth. Whether or not you might believe his words are all true, word by word, I'll let you decide. Satanism is self-worship and is based around worshipping nature, therefore, not meant for everyone.
Luciferianism - This is totally different from standard Satanism. Lucifierian Satanists worship the entity, Lucifer, who reigns over hell. They believe if they worship the devil he will grant all of their wishes and award them with a high social class in Hell. I do not believe in any entities, especially the devil, so I wouldn't suggest this religion.
Wiccan Paganisn- Wiccans worship a Goddess and they worship nature. They don't use nature for their own purposes, but rather do everything they can for nature. Finding good wiccan imformation is difficult because there are many false spellbooks out on the market as a simple scam to attempt to make money. I don't suggest this religion for I do not believe in any entities.
Nonbelief- The nonbelieves do not believe in religion, they see it as a purpose to explain life and ruin it, and prevent fear of death. Nonbelievers are offended by being called atheists, for atheist is the word given by Christian to those who do not follow their God. They sometimes believe in witchcraft, but not in most cases.
Gothic- This is an actual religion, but its one I know nearly nothing about because it is practiced in Europe much more then here. The Gothic Religion tends to be like Satanism as it tends to be conceded, but rather then nature based its more sexually based for ones own desires. The Gothic Religion tends to be an excuse to have sex, therefore I do not suggest this religion. Ussually its composed of cemetery sluts, succubi, and inccubi.
The world is what we make it, so lets make it wicked. (return to top)
VIII - ENSCRIBED IN BLOOD
This is a journal I wrote about a year ago, it displays some of my views on life, and therefore I found it to work well as part of Bloodletter's Grimoire.
ALL IS THE PRODUCT OF THE MIND
The following is how I express what I believe in and how I explain who I am. It's kind of long so if you don't want to read it you certainly don't have to. I just felt I needed to write it all down, so I myself, knew myself better.
Some people at death see the gates of Heaven, or I suppose Hell. Your mind wants to please you. If you truly believe in heaven and God you're mind will allow you to go there at death. These things do not exist but your mind allows them to. At death if you believe you have served your own purpose in life and you believe in Heaven then before your body becomes lifeless and mindless it will create your final image of entering Heaven. It allows you to believe you will be happy for all eternity, but in reality it was just your last breath, your last thought, before you do indeed die. This occurrence is fascinating and it causes me to think more about what all the mind can do or make us think we can do.
Belief is a thing many people need to enjoy their lives. It gives people an answer to the question that has driven so many mad, why are we here? This can lead to the belief that so many have followed that a spirit made us, God. There are many religions because it doesn't matter how you answer the question, as long as it is answered. Many fear death; religion also allows death not to be feared, because it is thought that you will go to a better place after death. Some use religion as an excuse to enjoy life to its fullest, so you can get into heaven, if you "sin" for most of your life you'll go to Hell. The fear of spending eternity in Hell is what makes some people act as kindly as they do. Some people feel alone in the world, unloved, or insignificant, therefore they need God, the one that will never hurt them, never do them wrong, always understand what they're going through, and always forgive them and be their friends. Although this is not always the reason why people believe in God. Some worship the Devil, Satan, Lucifer, but why you may think, it will certainly not get you into Heaven. Some do not feel that just being happy for eternity in heaven is not enough. The Devil was a fallen angel, he started an empire with many followers, Hell. The power one would have to be the Devil or to be by his side tempts the mind and corrupts it. Torturing others appeals to others as long as they have the power over them. This is why some worship the Devil. God, Satan, Heaven, Hell, and other religions are all just figments of the mind that are used to explain our origins and to explain death without fearing it greatly. No one wants to know that once death comes upon them all they have ever known is gone, forever. The religions the mind devised are nearly as old as the mind itself. It hurts when so many do not understand what the world is.
Does good and evil even exist? It is just how the mind decides to accept certain things. Some people believe, for example, that cussing is evil. Language is a way the mind devised for us to communicate with each other. Some words are meant to be stronger then others, but language really can't be good or evil, it just depends how we use it and allow others to comply with it. Language is a great convenience that I wouldn't like to be without, but we devised it with the mind, communication is not evil. The mind can corrupt anything though. My mind was corrupted as a child, I heard and saw things my mind was not able to take in. Too much was forced for me to deal with and accept before I had the will power to understand it. I saw evil minds…I saw evil deeds caused by them…your childhood is what forms your mind into what it will become. I am a very considerate, compassionate, caring individual who does care about others, but that's only part of me. Part of me is suffering; always suffering, its in pain and I cannot allow it to control my mind. It nearly gained control of my mind once, not long ago. I was very depressed and didn't like how life was going for me. The part of my mind that is me was weakened, it became vulnerable. That suffering, that darkness in me became more powerful. It hurt me, it made me hate myself. All the feelings the mind can create to make me suffer more it did. The only thing that momentarily stunned the extreme pain in my mind that was the darkness taking over was to hurt myself physically, as bad as I could. I stabbed myself with knives, screwdrivers, pins, pencils, pens, and even my own nails and teeth. I liked to see the blood; I liked to see myself in pain. The darkness liked to see me in pain. This gave me temporary relief but it was just making the darkness stronger. Some days my head hurt worse, I told my friends to punch and kick me until I said stop. I didn't tell them to stop. Eventually they did anyway. The pain was still not great enough to match what was in my head. I would have gone insane if I didn't have the friends I have. I enjoyed putting myself in pain, but it caused me even greater pain to see the expressions of those I cared about seeing me in pain. The mind that was me was still weak and lurking within the back of my mind, it could not bare to watch me hurt the ones I care about most, as it grew stronger, the darkness weakened again, and now I am me again. The darkness is still there, it will never leave me; I will always be fighting it because I cannot allow it to control me. I am more careful with my problems now, I fear the darkness and I do not want to see it that strong ever again. I mean every word I have just said. If you do not believe me I don't care. The mind is a very powerful thing with many sides…don't ruin it, your mind is yours, don't lose it. It is the creator of happiness and love, but it also spawned hate and jealousy.
I admit how I dress is the result of the darkness, but I tried to dress other ways and I could not accept myself wearing anything else, of course I'll wear something goofy from time to time, but nothing I'd stick with. If I do not contain the darkness in what I wear it will reveal itself in a much worse method.
Which is more sinister, love or murder? It depends on how your mind compensates each of them. The people I have asked have had different answers, some say love, some say murder. There is no right or wrong answer, everyone's mind is different and will answer the question differently.
I believe all minds are entwined into some complex web of which limits are unknown. If you let yourself you know what others think. You can read their minds in comparison to your own. Some things you cannot read, some things you cannot understand, because some minds are tainted in different ways, but you know that everyone, no matter how calm or insane they may seem, feel pain, feel love, and know you do too. This web does not just extend through humans, but to many animals too. Have you ever had a cat that knew when you needed comforting? A dog that did its best to protect you when it knew you were in trouble? We are not alone in this world, we are animals too, and we live among them, we just often think too highly of ourselves over them. Have you ever sensed of things that will come? Have you known a friend was hurting when they gave no indication? When you look into someone's eyes do you see something deeper?
Have you ever seen something that you cannot explain? Have you ever felt that you were not alone when it was clear that you were? Have you ever gone within a house much older then you are and felt the memories of its past? When someone is killed or dies before the mind is ready to die, it won't die. This is something I cannot explain in much detail because it is something I know very little about myself. The mind intends to live until it is satisfied with what it has seen. Some houses are considered haunted, spirits or ghosts do sometimes live within. Bound to somewhere until they find what they needed, once they find what was needed to be known, they would fall into their eternal rest, never to be awoken again. The thought of ghosts I revise over and over again, for it is hard to explain even to myself.
How powerful the mind is will never be known, but don't ever underestimate it.
I am not trying to convert your beliefs, I am simply telling you mine. I needed to get my thoughts down, and so I have and I wish to share them with those who don't understand me or how I look upon the world. I don't need a religion to enjoy life, when death comes I will be saddened by it, but I will accept it. I love life and everyday I look forward to see what tomorrow will bring. (return to top)
IX - PROOF THE BIBLE IS FALSE
This section of Bloodletter's Grimoire I did find from other sources, but
it is very important if you believe the bible is true. If you don't believe
in the bible anyway then there is little purpose in reading this section,
but before you finish Bloodletter's Grimoire I do suggest reading the last
chapter.
Contradictions
1. The very first page of the Old Testament opens right up with contradictory
descriptions of the creation (Genesis 1 vs. Genesis 2). For example, if the
Institute for Creation Research sought relevant information from Genesis,
would they determine that plants were created, then animals, then humans (Genesis
1), or humans, then plants then animals (Genesis 2)?
2. Likewise, the very first page of the New Testament introduces another major
contradiction: inconsistent genealogies of Jesus in Matthew and Luke. Some
have "explained" this by saying that Luke is the genealogy of Mary;
such a claim acknowledges error, since Luke specifically states that it is
the genealogy of JOSEPH [Luke 3:23], just like Matthew [Matt 1:16]. So, either
there is a contradiction (Matthew says that Jacob is the father of Joseph;
Luke says Heli is the father of Joseph, and from there back to Solomon not
a single name is the same; not even the same number of generations), or one
of them is making an incorrect statement about a relevant fact for Jesus'
claim to the House of David.
3. Apostles James and Paul disagreed about a key doctrine: whether "salvation"
is by faith alone, or faith and works combined. Compare the direct contradictions
(when analyzed for parallel vocabulary and parallel grammatical structure
in the original language) in wording between Romans 3:28 and James 2:24.
Additional scriptures support faith alone (Romans 3:27-28 & 4:6; II Timothy
1:9; Ephesians 2:8-9; Galatians 2:16; Titus 3:5), while others specify the
need for works / good deeds (Matt 16:27, Revelations 2:26 & 20:12; 2 Timothy
4:14; Philippians 2:12; James 2:24-26).
In fact, it should be noted that the topic of what one must do (or be, or
believe) in order to enter heaven was a consistent source of contradiction
and disagreement which merits a separate discussion. Jesus had a very different
(and conflicting) teaching from that of Paul, whose version of Christianity
is essentially what has been handed down to us, owing to his phenomenal missionary
success with the result that, since most of the early Christians found their
way to this teaching by way of Paul, it is not surprising that it is his vision
of that teaching which has survived.
Failed Prophecies
1. Ezekiel chapter 26 ERRONEOUSLY predicts that during the reign of King Nebuchadnezzar
[Ez 26:7] the city of Tyre will be UTTERLY DESTROYED, become a BARE ROCK [Ez
26:4; 26:14 - KJV says "like the top of a rock"; NIV says "scrape
away the rubble and make a bare rock"], and NEVER BE REBUILT [Ez 26:14;
26:21]. The city was defeated in battle in 587 BC, during King Nebuchadnezzar's
reign, but was NOT "utterly" destroyed or "never rebuilt."
In fact, today has more than 20,000 inhabitants at the core of a metropolitan
area of more than 100,000 people! (Even within Bible times, long after the
battle described by Ezekiel, Tyre had already been rebuilt and, in New Testament
times it is still portrayed as a CITY (Mark 3:8) and as a harbor where ships
could unload (Acts 21:3,7) -- so I guess this could qualify not only as a
failed prophecy, but also as a CONTRADICTION.
2. Matt 12:40 clearly says: "For as Jonas was three days and three nights
in the whale's belly; so shall the Son of man be three days and three nights
in the heart of the earth." Please note it says THREE DAYS AND THREE
NIGHTS (the same as in Jonah 1:17 which it refers to). Yet ALL FOUR GOSPELS
report that Jesus died on Friday evening and was resurrected on Sunday morning
(at or before dawn, some more contradictions on this point), which would only
allow less than 36 hours, not three days AND three nights.
3. In Matt 24:34 Jesus predicts that the end of the world and all the fantastic
"signs" he describes will occur within the lifetimes of the "current
generation."
4. Isaiah 7:14 is widely claim as a prophesy for a messiah, who shall be given
the name "Immanuel." This must not be referring to the son of Mary
and Joseph, since they did NOT name him Immanuel, but rather, Jesus. The only
reference to the name Immanuel in the entire New Testament is Matt 1:23 referring
to Isaiah's prophecy, but even Matthew never actually uses that as a name
or reference to Jesus and, in fact, there is no Bible record of Jesus being
named or even ever called or referred to as "Immanuel."
Flaws and Errors
Exodus 22:18 COMMANDS the killing of witches. Lev 20:27 (KJV) commands the
killing of WIZARDS (Does that include the Wizard of Oz?)
Exodus 35:2 clearly states that those who work on the Sabbath should be put
to death. Do Bible believers feel they are morally obligated to kill those
with Sunday jobs themselves?
Lev. chapter 21, verses 17-24, makes it very clear that those with a variety
of disabilities are not welcome to approach the altar of God. Will Bible believers
initiate a campaign to overturn the wicked Americans with Disabilities Act?
Verse 20 specifically mentions any defect or "blemish" in one's
vision. I have to admit that I wear prescription glasses to read. Does my
vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
Numbers Chapter 31 COMMANDS the Israelites to invade the Midianites (verse
1-2), the chapter goes on to describe the cruelty, destruction and taking
of spoils of war COMMANDED by God. It says God COMMANDS the killing of every
adult male, and this was done (verse 7). When they return with the male children
and females, they are COMMANDED BY GOD to kill all the male children and all
the females who "have known man intimately," which is Bible language
for not being virgins (verse 17). But it tells this bunch of horny warriors,
as part of their spoils of war, to keep alive the virgin girls "for yourselves"
(verse 18) For what? To marry them? Yeah ... they just killed their fathers,
mothers, brothers and any sisters who weren't virgins, and they can really
look forward to a loving marital bliss (at least the Israelites won't have
to worry about "in-law" problems, but one would think a compassionate
God would have more consideration for these poor girls). To baby sit them?
Why just the girls and not the boys? Why only virgins? Why is their sexual
history relevant? Given what we know of the culture of that time, and the
tradition of rape and pillage allowed by conquering warriors, and that this
is given as a litany of military spoils, in that context it clearly appears
that, according to this passage, that God (through Moses) is COMMANDING RAPE!!
(Verses 30-35 showing the command was obeyed).
Deut 22:28-29 "[28] If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged
to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, [29] he shall pay the
girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has
violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives. (NIV)." In
no way is the rape victim given a choice. The marriage MUST HAPPEN. Perhaps
she had refused his proposal! All he has to do is RAPE her and she's TRAPPED
for the rest of her poor, miserable life, no matter how righteous and virtuous
she had tried to live. She is a double victim.
Deut. 23:1-2 Commands that a man wounded in the genitals be considered an
outcast, and that a bastard (the innocent child of illicit sexual relations)
be outcast "even to his tenth generation." (No wonder abortion was
practiced, and permitted in the law -- and in fact, is not prohibited in any
place in the Bible.)
2 Kings 2:23-24 shows that God, through his prophet Elisha, causes two she-bears
to attack 42 "small boys" simply because they made fun of Elisha's
baldness.
Judges 11:29-40 God's covenant with Jephthah requires Jephthah to give his
virgin daughter as burnt offering, and it is done.
The Bible is pro-slavery. There are many examples in the Old Testament where
slavery was approved by God; it was even COMMANDED that captives in war be
taken as slaves (Num 31; Joshua 9:23). Leviticus 25:44-46 outlines the do's
and dont's of permissible slavery. Verse 46 specifically permits slavery,
as long as fellow Hebrews are not the slaves. In the kinder, gentler New Testament,
Paul wrote that slaves should be obedient to their masters (Eph 6:5-7 &
Titus 2:9-10). In IPeter 2:18, it is even specified to be submissive both
to masters who are overbearing as well as gentle! Why didn't they speak out
against this moral outrage? Were they afraid of the law? They could at least
have remained neutral on the subject.
Leviticus gives some excellent examples of flaws and contradictions. (For
those who claim that the Mosaic Law was superseded/replaced by Jesus' higher
law, or that Christians are under mercy and not law, I would just say: don't
go around using Leviticus to condemn homosexuals if you don't follow all of
its commandments with equal enthusiasm.)
Lev chapter 11 enumerates permissible and forbidden foods. Permitted are cloven-hooved
cud-chewing animals such as cows and lambs (v.3); forbidden are cloven-hooved
non-cud-chewing animals (camels, etc.); additional animals prohibited as meat
include rabbits (v.6), PORK (v.7). Verses 8-9 specify that fish with fins
and scales are permitted, but all other seafood (specifies both seas and rivers)
is an ABOMINATION. So I hope none of you Bible-lovers are too fond of shrimp,
crab, lobsters, oysters, etc., are feeling too cramped by the LAW. Actually,
I recommend the whole 11th chapter of Leviticus to anyone who takes the Bible
too literally. Fortunately, I am a vegetarian (in the spirit of the 6th commandment)
so I'm probably one of the few on this board who will make it to heaven, if
these scriptures will be used as any part of the criteria for admission.
Lev chapter 12 describes a woman's uncleanliness during and after menstruation,
and ritual purification for women. I hope all those women who cite Old Testament
commandments against anything are strict in the obedience to these rituals.
Of course, since they can't speak in Church (1Cor 14:34-35), we don't need
to hear them griping about it.
What the Bible IS and IS NOT
But the real question is: What does the Bible itself say about its own "infallibility"?
Actually, it says nothing. The Bible in its current compilation didn't even
exist until several centuries after the last book was written. Why are religious
zealots so quick to claim divine authorship of a book that doesn't even claim
it for itself (with the exception of specific portions of law and prophecy
such as "Thus sayeth the Lord...," but not to the modern Bible as
a whole)? The Bible was a collection of separate writings (laws, plays, poems,
songs, histories and letters) by individual religious commentators who never
imagined their writings would ever be considered divine. They are just like
modern writers, making commentary and analysis, who just happened to have
their works assembled and voted on by later believers who then canonized their
words. They refer to the sanctity of sacred scripture (the body already canonized
before their time -- such as the Law of Moses and the writings of the Old
Testament prophets) never imagining that someday THEIR writings, letters,
or whatever will be added to the canon. Paul the Apostle, who clearly believed
that the established scripture of his day was inspired (see 2Tim 3:16), also
clearly acknowledged that some of his own writings were NOT, as when he wrote
in 1 Cor 7:12 "But to the rest speak I, NOT THE LORD..." (emphasis
added); and 2 Cor 11:17 "That which I speak, I speak [it] NOT AFTER THE
LORD..." (emphasis added).
The early Christians themselves did not have an "infallible Bible"
to carry around with them -- it wasn't even compiled until centuries later.
Just as we gain insights and understanding from modern writers and commentators
of today, without claiming that they are divine and infallible, we can gain
insight and understanding from ancient writers, as long as we consider their
works for what they are, with critical thinking and common sense -- not just
blind faith.
We should accept the Bible for what it is: often wise and inspirational, but
many times filled with error and cruelty. It is an important historical relic,
and the original seed from which much of ethical theory in the Western world
has developed, but its words must be discussed, analyzed and evaluated on
their merits -- as the writing of men, not of God. It does not claim to be
anything more. (return to top)
X - SUFFERING MOONS
Sometimes you have to ask yourself, why keep living? Why keep suffering? What's the point? We all have those days in our lives that seem as though we can bear no more. Christians have a simple reason to keep living, live well, live happy, get into Heaven, kill yourself go to Hell. We have no Heaven and we have no Hell, so what's there to fear? Why not just end it all right this very moment? It makes no difference when you're dead whether or not worms eat your carcass. You only live once, it is a privilege, don't take it away from yourself. Why would you want to kill yourself, perhaps one of the following reasons: you feel alone, you have no friends or think you don't, extreme heartbreak, death of someone close to you, a series of smaller problems that add up to become one significant problem, annoyance of the world, loss of job, lack of love, there's so many things to choose from, and its quite probable that you might even suffer from more then one reason. Of course there's many more reasons that I didn't mention as well. The past is what hurts us, the past is what haunts us, but the past cannot be changed. Don't let the past effect your present and your future. You don't know what the future holds for you, it can change at any time, you just have to let it. If you expect the future to be retched simply because you are wallowing in the memories of the past, then your future will be the same. Each day is different from the last, each second is one further into the future. At any point in time you can change how you feel, you can change how you look at the world, you can change all that is you, for the better. Get over the past. When those horrible moments reach their peak and are at their worse, to the point where you cannot bear it anymore, hang in there, things can only get better. Life will go on. Each day I look forward to the next for I never know what tomorrow will bring. So remember, when things seem awful, keep breathing, keep living, things will get better, know for a fact that they'll get better, convince yourself of it, and all will get better. Life is not meant to be hard, but its not meant to be easy either, so it simply depends on how you wish to look at it. (return to top)
XI - ETERNAL INTELLECT
There are two types of intelligence, common sense, and book smarts. Usually people have more then one then the other, but when you have a great amount of both, then you are a genius. Book smarts is basically everything you were meant to learn in school. If you have a large vocabulary and are good at math or anything scientific, then you have very good book smarts. Book smarts causes you to think up theorys about life, and its truths, as I am teaching you, this is book smarts, but common sense is applying it. You can take in everything I teach you and teach it to your friends, but you might not apply it to yourself and your life. Common sense is applying it to your life. Common sense is knowing the results of doing something before doing it. If you lack common sense then you probably often make stupid mistakes in your own life. Now if you can do both, see life as it is and live it differently because of that, live life as it should be lived, then you are a genius. Open your mind to all knowledge, let it seep deep within your soul, then use it, don't just preach it, live your life by it too. I'll give some examples of people who model eternal intellect so you can better make a connection with what I'm saying. Einstein was a genius. He looked at life differently then everyone else, he took the first few steps to knowing exactly what life is about. When he retired he still pondered all about life. This quote by Einstein helps say exactly what I'm trying to: "Any fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius-and a lot of courage-to move in the opposite direction." Einstein questioned the majority. He didn't just think it was best to move in a new direction, he applied his knowledge and did move in a different direction. If he thought it would improve his life, then he applied it to his life. A few examples of this from here are that he wouldn't know his own telephone number, he believed that the mind should be saved for important information, not number that's could be written down. He wore the same clothes everyday, well he changed his clothes he just had numerous copies of all of the same clothes, so he didn't have to take the time to decide what to wear. Einstein had book smarts and common sense. Now lets look at some examples of people who only had book smarts. Anton Szandor Levay, he was a very bright man who made people question the way the world was. He started an entirely new religion and he preached what he thought were to be the truths of the world, but he lacked common sense. Outside of the church he himself didn't always follow his own preachings. He was a man, like anyone else, who made stupid mistakes, but he knew better. Levay's words are inspiring, but he was a liar when it came to his own life. His life was like anyone else's, but he exaggerated it greatly in attempt to get attention drawn to himself. He didn't treat his family with respect and he didn't treat his pets with respect, like he preaches in The Satanic Bible. Levay was a very smart man but he lacked the common sense to follow his own teachings. For those who don't care for Levay, here's another example perhaps you can relate to. Let's say a lawyer goes home and beat his wife and children. He is a lawyer and knows its wrong, yet he does it anyway. The lawyer would have book smarts but again lack common sense. Now let's look at people that lack book smarts, but have common sense. Perhaps you never went to college and only passed high school with a "D" or "C", you could easily lack book smarts. If you always make the right choices in your life then you could easily live a happy life without book smarts, you just probably won't get rich off of it. You may not know a thing when it comes to math, but perhaps you take care of your family, and our great at your job, and basically live up to everything you say you will, then you are one who is more balanced on common sense. Very few people lack both. If you lack both it can be assumed that you will go nowhere in life and always make the wrong decisions, but since this is rare let's not go deep into it. I'm not saying its bad to have more book smarts then common sense, or vice versa, but if you can categorize yourself and your knowledge, then you've come one step closer to seeing the world in all its impurity. When you recognize yourself and your limits for what they are, in all honesty, you will succeed them. (return to top)
XII - KNOWLEDGE IS POWER
I hope you've enjoyed reading Bloodletter's Grimoire and have been inspired by all I have written, go live your life as it should be lived, and remember, The Devil is the author of confusion, and Christianity and the bible are confusing, therefore the bible was written by the Devil, making God the Devil, and making the true God the one who says do as thou will and rejoice in sin and enjoy the forbidden fruits of life because there is no heaven and there is no hell. If there was a hell EVERYONE would be going there. See you in Hell! (return to top)
Warlock Kyle, Daemonicus Bloodletter